Third Kiss: How do you communicate in particular in English or in another foreign language?
A Communication Coach for English at your service
During my long experience as a conference interpreter I translated thousands of Italian and foreign speakers, thus finding myself in a favourable position to observe a huge number of communication strategies, with various degrees of success.
In this series of posts (the "kisses"), I have decided to dwell on some recurrent communication errors made by non-native speakers when they deliver presentations in English. My job consists in guiding, mentoring and coaching those who are confronted with this challenge.
Young people who are fortunate enough to study in English-speaking or international settings for long periods acquire such skills without much effort: they automatically learn the communications codes and structures in English that are currently applied at world level. They assimilate the current language (films, songs, podcasts and a wealth of online resources), whereas those who are over forty have mainly used books, with the help of poorly qualified teachers. Moreover, a language needs to be continuously practised, which is not an easy task to perform in our intense and frantic lives. For all these reasons, public speaking – a source of fear in general – can become paralysing if you are required to deliver your speech in English.
As is the case for all challenges, the solution lies in identifying the gaps and strive to bridge them.
Oftentimes the gaps are not merely linguistic, but also related to the idiomatic use of the communication codes of the foreign language/culture. If you ignore the rules used in the foreign kingdom you are not in a position to meet them, thus fearing to make mistakes and be punished (bad impression, missed business or professional opportunities).
Ideally, we should all be entitled to speak our own language, but this is not always possible.
As a consequence, the best strategy is learning the fundamental laws of the foreign kingdom by studying on your own or, if possible, with a specialised coach.
I already underlined how important it is to sound genuine, even in English.
Think about those moments in your daily life when you feel that you are deeply and authentically communicating to your listener. You will realise that they have some features in common, which are useful guidelines for our communication in English as well:
We are entirely focused on the other person(s) and not on ourselves: we totally identify ourselves with our goal – explaining/guiding/informing/communicating – to the benefit of the listener (from self-centred to selfless).
For instance, we do not aim at appearing erudite but rather at being clear and effective in conveying our message.
The use of a specific jargon and acronyms often contributes to accuracy, but you should always make sure that your audience can understand it. Do not give anything for granted, but avoid sounding too didactic.
Your sentences are short, simple, relevant, targeted to your communication goals: attributes and synonyms in excess would merely turn your speech heavier without adding any precious content.
Avoid asides and digressions that can be distracting both for the speaker and for the audience. The average attention span is short and tends to fade quickly if your speech is confusing or baroque.
You only use repetitions if you deem that they help your listeners, while you avoid all useless verbosity: a recap can be a very good tool to refresh your listeners’ memory, especially at the end of a long explanation.
You express yourself in a natural and idiomatic manner: even though most presentations are accurately prepared, always remember that they are delivered orally and not on a piece of paper. There is an enormous difference between the two.
If you are sincere your verbal and non-verbal cues are aligned: alternatively, your listeners will perceive a mismatch, possibly at an unconscious level. They will feel that there is something out of place. In order to avoid this inconvenience when you speak in English, I recommend a thorough preparation so as to ease your tension and allow a smooth communication flow.
Visualise yourself telling something important and elevating to somebody you love. What is your message like? Genuine, clear and simple.
This concept is summarised in the title of this post. Third Kiss is a pun that should not be taken literally (certainly not during social distancing, when kisses are strictly prohibited). It’s my third post on the concept summed up in the acronym KISS*, i.e. KEEP IT SHORT AND SIMPLE. A safe compass to effective communication, especially in English.
One more kiss to come soon…
* “KISS” also stands for Keep it Simple, Stupid…which does not apply here given the high level of our readers.
Have you missed my Second Kiss? No problem…it is still online. Click here.
